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Isn't this what you wanted?

And then you ask yourself, why did your mind have to wander to those places, why did your brute honesty have to be open, why did you have to feel dishonest when nothing went wrong? Why? You were given an open window, and you shut it close. And now your amazed as to why you can only see beauty through glass? You put that glass there. So shut the fuck up and stop acting useless, because there is no use in wanting something and not doing anything, when you know the only way to get it is to go through the obstacles which you put in between each other. It's your mess, you fucked up, so it's your call, look through the window, or break the glass. Are some small cuts in your hands worth it? I think so.

<3.

No se que decirte...
Vivo una ilusión,
Llevo meses sin verte,
Meses sin poder mirar,
la belleza que un día,
hace ya mucho tiempo,
se presento ante mi.

Pasaron meses, si,
pero no paso un minuto,
en que en mi mente,
no estabas tu.

Te tengo cerca a mi corazón,
Porque se que contigo,
es diferente.

No se como explicarte,
Ni decirte,
lo precioso que es,
lo que me haces sentir.

Vivo mi vida sin preocupación,
Y aunque pasen los días,
mi sentimientos no cambiaran,
porque se que eres tu

La que me hace viajar a lugares,
en la cual nunca he estado.
La que me trae sonrisas,
En mis peores momentos,

La que me hace pensar,
que el mundo es perfecto.

Te podria decir que te quiero,
que te amo,
y que sin ti no puedo vivir,

Pero todo eso, ya lo sabes,

Lo unico que quiero que sepas,
Es que no importa que hagas,
Adonde y con quien estes,

Siempre estare aqui por ti,
Porque eres mas que cualquiera,
Me completas.

Alocada y bella,
Me traes sonrisas,
Con tu corazon,
me cambias el mundo.

Te soy honesto,
No se que siento por ti,
Pero se que sin ti,
no podria…

Tendre que aprender..

me encuentro en un lugar,
desesperado,
tirando lirica, sin explicar,
lo que siento, tu no puedes palpar,
mi corazon quiere explotar,
me he convertido,
en la persona que mas odio,
y aunque siempre he notado,
que lo que mas odias de los otros,
son las cualidades, que tu mas tienes,
no logro entender,
quien soy, ni como llegue a ser,
he cambiado, estoy destrozado,
he perdido amigos,
y lo que he llegado a entender,
es que aquellas personas,
que mueven tu mundo,
te hacen ser.

Entre a este nuevo mundo,
con una ensenanza que movio mi parecer,
'aprecia todo lo que tienes, y no tendras nada que perder',
tal pensamiento, que vino a mi en las acciones de un gran ser,
no he llegado a aprender.

Y ahora extrano, lo que ya no tengo,
por no apreciarlo, cuando estuvo frente a mi,
no se que hacer,
pero siento que todo, lo he hechado a perder.
Por eso, tendre que aprender.

I can't feel right.

It's really hard,
to sit here,
and think of life,
without you.

I don't know,
how to make things,
the same,
perhaps, im trying too hard.

But I want you back,
All has gone black,
I am blinded by pain,
my words have done me no gain.

Please, just let me know,
if such mistake,
cost me you,
if my words, have ruined it all.

I need to know, because
My heart is torn apart,
by the very thing,
I was going to do.

By almost making a mistake,
and loosing a close friend,
I think, i may have lost you,
I really hope, this is not true,

Because a moment comes in time,
where your words serve me right,
and all I need,
is some wisdom, and peace.

I love being direct,
but maybe you need some space,
I love making things right,
But as you wisely told me once,

You can't make everybody happy,
I just really hope,
that you are not part,
of everybody,

Out of my own spellbook,
I think, I may have lost you,
because I considered loosing,
your best friend.

I don't know what to say,
I don't know who I am these days,
But I really think,
I fin…

La rosa mas preciosa.

Mi preciosa rosa,
Vivi años contigo,
viajamos a lugares donde pocos,
se atrevieron a ir,
Y aqui estamos,
Miles de millas aparte,
juntos, pero distantes.

Te conoci como a una rosa,
En el amanecer del verano,
Salia el sol con orgullo,
Y tu brillabas con perfeccion.

Conoci a una rosa,
Con bellezas inexplicables,
Conoci a lo mas bello del mundo,
Cuyo no me podre olvidar.

Con esa rosa, vino un gran envase,
Lleno de vida y amor,
Alimento a su rosa,
Porque ella era, la mas preciosa.

Nunca pense separar a ese envase,
Ni a esa rosa,
Porque juntos iban,
de aqui al espacio,
Con un amor, que en mis ojos,
era perfecto.

Pero el tiempo nos gano,
Vino corriendo, y se llevo
A la rosa, y a su envase,
lejos de uno y del otro.

La rosa intento,
mandarle petalos a su envase,
Enviarle todo el amor que tenia,
Pero entre mas el recibia,
Mas sabia, que el no podia.

El envase se ahogo en lagrimas,
Y se despidio de su rosa,
porque el sabia,
que no podia vivir,
sin tal preciosa cosa.

La rosa, desolada y abandonada,
No encontro la diferencia,
entre tal e…

Porque es dificil...

Es dificil,
olvidar mi pasado,
Cerrar mis ojos,
y mirar al futuro,
Cuando no sabes que viene,
Y sabes que lo que vino,
ya se ha ido.

Miras las piezas,
Que han seguido un camino,
Te identificas,
Y desvaneces,
remplazado en el futuro de otros.

Quieres llorar,
Tus emociones no puedes aguantar,
Rompes el rompecabeza de tu historia,
Y aunque quieres recoger las piezas...

Miras al piso, y el presente se ha formado.
Notas que las piezas forman algo nuevo,
y el pasado no se ha ido,
Sigue alli, y el futuro tambien.

Quizas lleguen nuevas piezas,
O vuelvan viejas,
pero todo sigue alli,
y aunque la vista se nubla,
y tus ojos apenas se aguantan,
Sonries.

Sonries porque tu vida no es facil,
Porque viviste por un motivo,
Porque no fue en vano,
Porque extranas el pasado,
Porque viviste tu vida,
Pero encima de todo...

Porque las miles de millas,
que separan tu corazon,
no disuelven tu historia,
porque el tiempo,
no disuelve tu amor,
pero mas que todo,
porque el futuro,
siempre tendra sus piezas,
del pasado.

Little Miss Sunshine

I was in the middle of something,
but then everything stopped,
I need you to stop, and listen.

You didn't move forward,
to look back,
You didn't take that step,
to go back down,
You didn't take this test,
To then give it a rest.

I close my eyes and wonder,
How many times I've felt this way,
How much I would give the world,
to bring it all back,
Knowing that I can't,
Knowing that tommorow will not be yesterday,
And today will stay the same.

Perhaps I need the past,
Perhaps I need my friends,
Perhaps I need it all back,
But I say this blind folded,

I have ventured into the unknown,
Into a world which I had never seen before,
Into something I have grown to hate,
Because it looks nothing like the green grass,
And smells nothing like the blue waters,
Where am I? Why can't I just go back?

The moment you set forth in your travels,
Forward into a new life,
You didn't leave your past,
You packed it with you in stirred emotions,
and put it in your carry-on.

We don't leave to suffer,
We leave to…

What are we supposed to do after all that we've been through...

When everything that felt so right is wrong?

It's interesting, where you draw the line... Confusing as well. The world of peace and tranquility is impossible, and its existence shall always remain a dream, an objective, a place we would love to set ourselves towards endlessly, rather than simply reaching it. Simple words can change the life of another human being, and in many circumstances, they have. I write to you, in confusion, I don't know where life has gone, but the beauties within it still remain. Dropping from one and rising to the other, I await a sound wave, but at the same time, am reluctant to hear it. I wish and dont wish, I simply don't want to decide.

Why can't two worlds coincide? Why can't my life be settled as is, without problems? It wouldn't be much of a life would it?

Watching a speaker recently, I recall him asking his audience, how many liked surprises, the response was indefinitely yes. Little did they know, problems were surprises, and the…

Write it out for me.

I look back,
so much time has past,
I start to remember,
the wrong path...

What I have done,
Has made me who I am,
What I have done,
Has left me with what I have.

It hurts to remember,
The silly mistakes,
Which have risen so vividly,
Within the scars of my heart.

His mistakes,
resemble mine,
to such an extent,
that I try to forget.

You dig through,
the pages of my memory,
and penetrate deep within,
the golden departure.

And yet, one thing keeps me hanging,
within this thin line,
that I have lived by,
One thing keeps me alive.

A smile comes upon my soul,
and I fly away in peace,
knowing that my mistakes,
Are lessons which will never cease.

Lessons of life,
Which have taught me how to live,
Lessons of life,
which everyone has to live.

So don't close your eyes,
and tremble.
Close them, and wait,
Because the colors of life
Will return.

As you blink again,
you notice that despite your mistakes,
It is your friends,
that truly have not left.

With this in mind,
I close this open novel,
Leaving the unanswered pages,
For another hear…

The lines of friendship.

Coming down quickly,
Things try to fit in,
I try to make it work,
Everything in harmony.

We are all different,
That's for certain,
and although we turn and twirl,
there's only one way we fit together.

You try to make it work,
By twisting things around,
Setting it up for our perfect friend,
Indeed, I speak of the line.

It comes down quickly,
and rarely do you lay it down,
As you try to complete,
many lines at a time.

But victory is never eminent,
The unbeatable game,
gets faster,
As even you, the master,
fails to prevent a disaster.

And so you count the lines,
which quickly disappear,
If you leave no hole,
In the friendship of pieces.

Because its the hole,
covered by the masses,
which wont let you erase,
all those mistakes.

So keep your words honest,
And leave no lies within,
Because as in a game of Tetris,
a small hole will destroy,
The greatest lines of friendship.

Me for you.

Dark clouds
ventured within wires
The scent of our own
Is what we lived by.

I close my eyes,
As tears shatter,
relentlessly,
My memory is disturbed.

A tender hand,
Flawless hair,
My generation to come,
was taken, and is now gone.

In a blur,
My glassy crystals,
were seen by none,
As in fear, they looked away.

Too long was spent,
In the hands of evil,
Too long was spent,
In the hands of the devil.

And although I have lived,
And will continue to live,
My life was eaten alive,
By those who took her away.

My soul in exchange for hers,
My life in return of hers,
I give you my grief,
and take this suffering.

As I tremble in suffering,
I cannot imagine her,
In tears for me,
had the pages been reversed.

And so I sacrifice my heart,
In the eyes of her pain,
I sacrifice my last breathe,
Hoping she wouldn't have to do the same.

The Well

You fall so deep,
into memories,
and scary flashbacks.

It all comes back,
in a moment's time,
You tremble,
You remember your crime.

The law did not prohibit,
A world of emotions,
In search of freedom,
They let us feel.

Deep in pain,
And pure agony,
I saw the white light,
The last station of my train.

A quick turn,
A dripping palette,
Life had come back,
Derailed from its track.

Truly unexpected,
And with a soothing flow,
Came a joyful tear.

I wanted gold,
With a rising sunflower,
The growth of an era,
Seemingly endless.

And yet death rose,
Into jewelry,
And winter's dust,
I fell again,
It was the end.

A near milestone,
Shivered dry,
Dawn came,
And I began to cry.

The dead bouquet,
And dark waves,
had risen again,
A summer's miracle,
Which I hold tightly.

I hope you,
Make my eyes close lightly,
I hope you,
Shine through,
The dark wall.

I hope you,
Don't let me fall.

qk..

Emotionless feelings.

A bottom-less bottle,
An endless exposition
What I once felt,
My emotions revealed.

How is it that so many,
Have loved so much,
That so many have lost,
And yet smiled,
for what they loved.

I cannot tell you,
what love is,
As such a great feeling,
comes merely in pairs.

You cannot feel love,
In independence,
You cannot feel love,
All on your own.

In the eyes of others,
You are emotionless,
Without anyone else,
Life is dry,
Life is dead.

Acknowledge your fears,
But fight them,
Hide your emotions,
But show them.

I have come to realize,
My words will not
Move your heart,
Or set your feelings,
Free.

However, I hope,
You come to realize,
That getting hurt,
is more than just pain.

The world was born,
in black and white.
But today
It's in the midst of gray.

You stand in the horizon,
Without evil, or good,

You fear flying,
Because you might fall,

You fear loving,
Because you might loose it all,

You fear living,
Because you might say goodbye,

I ask you,
Not to fear it all.

Spread your wings,
And be willing to fall,

Open your heart,
And your …

You.

A locked diary,
My feelings enclosed,
I left it all,
In a chamber of secrets.

A closed book,
A lost key,
My heart was locked,
For eternity.

A series of events,
Led me to believe,
That the kindest heart,
could tear,
the most innocent soul.

In tears,
I hid within myself,
My heart was filled,
one too many times.

I was led to believe
in lies, and half-truths,
I was played and teased,
I fell in too deep.

I cannot come out,
of this dark and icy cave,
Which I built to protect,
An innocent soul.

I feel no anger,
I feel no hate,
I feel nothing,
Within this blockade.

Brick by brick,
I covered myself,
Isolated from friends,
I tear their hearts.

Hoping for a savior,
I led them all away,
I made my biggest mistake.

And yet I cannot feel,
Any regret,
As my feelings lie,
Within the locked diary,
Whose key I do not have.

My only hope,
Lies within a magical key,
Whose combination,
Goes beyond the determination,
Of everyone within.

My only hope,
Is that someday,
You will see through,
The thick bricks,
And reach deep within,
My isolated cave.

My only hop…

Things fall apart.

No leaves move,
Beyond the gust,
I am puzzled,
At the emotion-less lust.

After months,
I realized one thing,
The numbness,
It would never go away.

Dry and cold,
Winter's pinnacle,
It was a lifetime,
Of no emotions.

A tempting choice,
Quickly dried out,
Irony at its best,
A happy place,
Which was not right.

How could I read,
The mixed signals,
How could I go past,
An unchanged expression.

Yell at me,
Scream at me,
I beg you please,
Let me feel
that you are real.

A history has closed you,
It has taken your life,
You are a loving teddy bear,
A small child's addiction,
For a few months in time.

But in truth,
You are purely potential,
A hopeful sight in the future,
An icy smile in the present,
A truly constant past.

I ask no more,
As I forget my teddy bear,
And remind myself, that today,
You are nothing.
With hope that tomorrow,
You will be something.